PROLOGUE
“Uncle come and see this”. With a world weariness, hard to comprehend, the Adjutant looked up from his paper work and gave me a long hard look. “If this is one of your damn unfunny jokes Vagabond I’ll have the C.O. ground you so help me I will”. “After that little episode with the Aspidistra you are not his favourite pilot at the moment, indeed I’m not sure you ever were”.
“I’m sorry about his Aspidistra, I did try and explain it was a genuine mistake but he didn’t seem interested in my explanation”. “No well blaming Bouncer Berry for you p**sing in his Aspidistra was never going to be a good explanation” he replied. “Yes but it was true, I asked Berry how much water to use and he said a chamber pot full should do, it is a big plant after all. I just thought it would save me filling the chamber pot and pouring it on to the bally plant if I went direct, so to speak”.
Uncle didn’t bang his head on the desk but I thought he might and so to change the subject back to my original purpose I said “Biff asked me to fetch you, he’s a bit worried about the new man Ichiro and wanted your opinion on the matter first”.
Hum, I see what you mean he said when we entered Ichiro’s small billet, he must have heard of you trialling the flying armour for General Melchet and decided he should do the same. He’ll never get into the cockpit in that thing, but at least he’s got Kitchener’s mustachios, that should get him some brownie points with the General Staff.
Just then Ichiro entered his billet and with a cheery “What ho chaps, I see you’re admiring my families heredity suit of armour” “Yes” responded Uncle, I think like me he couldn’t quite get used to Ichiro’s accent, solid upper middle class public school. “I was just saying to Vagabond here how nice it was, 17 century? However you’ll not be able to get into the DH2 cockpit in it, there’s not as much room as the planes you trained in”
His face lit up with a big beaming smile, “Good grief, you didn’t think I was going to fly in the bally thing did you?” “A man would have to be mad to fly in a suit of armour, wouldn’t he” Uncle just glanced in my direction and nodded in agreement.
No – my father insisted I take it to war with me but even the old man wouldn’t expect me to use it for goodness sake this is the 20th century after all, I hope I have the spirit of a Samurai but I don’t dress like one.
Uncle turned is dour expression on me and said, “Well - you had both better get on down to the hangers and find out from Anstruther-Browne what today has in store for you. I expect it will be instructive and with that rather ominous utterance he departed back to his office.
“Balloons chaps, that’s what we are after today and big, fat, grey, sizzling sausages is what we’ll have too, or my names not “Biff,” said Biff.
“We need to get this over with pretty quick as well, I’m playing for the Mortuary and Gravediggers 1st team against the Storekeepers and Ordinance Wallah’s at Division this afternoon and I don’t want to be late”.
“The artillery chaps have one of our balloons directing fire at the Hun and they think it’s damned unsporting of the Hun to have one of their own directing fire at our chaps”. “You can’t really disagree with that so I want you Vagabond to protect our balloon from any interference from the German flyers and Hiroshi and I will shoot down theirs, clear so far?” We both nodded with some satisfaction. Me because I had tried shooting down a balloon before and it was much harder than it seemed and jolly dangerous too, they were always protected by AA guns and usually had scout cover as well. Hiroshi because he was new and had no idea what he was in for, he would soon learn.
LOG
That same morning Ltn Hans Kunn was sat in the seat of his Fokker E111 pondering on how only a few months before his mount had outclassed all the French and British planes flying over the trenches but that had changed, first with the arrival of the British FE2b’s and now with these new DH2’s the British seemed to have the measure of his monoplane. He was glad not to be flying against the French at the moment because they had a startlingly pretty and very effective plane called a Nieuport that was killing his colleagues very efficiently around Verdun.
His job was to protect a Bratwurst, and he looked over at his two comrades who had the much more dangerous job of destroying the British one on the other side of the lines. In the far distance he could see some black specks they must be British planes, probably on the same job as him, although he hoped they would just pass on by and leave him alone. It had been a big night in the Mess last night, they were drinking to the lives and deaths of two pilots who had collided over the airfield and both died in the accident. He was learning that it took quite a lot of drink to drown out that sort of thing.
Left to right, Ichiro is flying the green and CDL DH2, he is flying as the right hand wingman to Biff in the CDL DH2 No 1.
Biff had given Ichiro strict instructions to stay away from the balloon and to protect Biff’s back while he does the dangerous work of balloon popping. This was Ichiro’s first mission and I could see he wasn’t listening at all. I was bringing up the rear with the British balloon off on my port side when I saw the Hun planes, I expected Biff would have picked them out well before I did, but I doubted Ichiro would see them for a few more minutes. He would soon learn.
From my vantage point behind them I could see that Ichiro was flying a very neat formation, close up on Biff’s starboard wing.
The same couldn’t be said for the enemy, the Hun pilot in the blue machine was eager to attack and he cut in front of a multi coloured cameo E111, an inexperienced pilot, he won’t last long flying like that, far too many pilots died in collisions. Little did I know that Ltn Kunn in the CDL Fokker was thinking the same thing.
Biff turned towards the balloon and Ichiro kept station, maybe he doesn’t have so much to learn I thought.
The cameo Fokker turned towards our balloon, as the blue one attacked Biff and Ichiro directly. I needed to get between the cameo Fokker and our balloon but he was much closer than I was, and he would get there much sooner than I could cut him off. Not a good start.
He opened fire at extreme range, it’s hard to miss these big balloons although difficult to take them down. Our observers must have been asleep because it was only as the bullets thudded into their gas bag that they jumped and parachuted to earth. I saw them land safely and could see the balloon ground crew start to winch the monster down, at that speed it was going to take a long time.
Biff turned to starboard to attack the German balloon, ignoring the blue Fokker coming in on his flank and Ichiro turned to port to attack it, a perfect team manoeuvre, that’s pretty good flying for a new boy, looks like he’s going to make a good wing man.
Biff firing at long range missed the balloon and Ichiro’s gun froze as he fired on the E111 but the Fokker’s return fire was much more effective.
Kunn who was in the CDL Fokker opened fire on Biff who was single-mindedly going for the balloon, I guess he was taking the cricket match seriously and trying to get the job done as quickly as possible but his gun jammed the same as Ichiro’s, the armourer is going to catch it in the neck when they get back, that’s for sure.
I could see Archie firing as a white puff of smoke left the gun barrel, (the white ring) very close to his own balloon, hasn’t he read the rules properly, obviously not.
The cameo Fokker turned into the balloon and continued firing, and I’m still too far away to intervene.
The Blue Fokker and Ichiro nearly collided as they fly past each other and so I have a choice, the Blue Fokker is right in front of me, I can see he is lining up to do an Immelmann turn right on to Ichiro’s tail, the Observers have jumped from the balloon and are safely on the ground, so I went for the Fokker to try and save the new boy.
Nearly colliding with the balloon the cameo Fokker was starting to bank hard to starboard, and in the distance you can see that the blue Fokker has done his Immelmann turn, he probably never saw me, I guess he was too focussed on Ichiro.
Unfortunately his manoeuvre completely threw my aim and my bullets went wide of the mark, but maybe they caused him to miss time his attack on Ichiro because he seemed to do very little damage to the young Japanese pilot’s plane and then the bullets stopped, he must be jammed.
Biff with his gun jammed flew under the German balloon as the CDL Fokker commenced to turn and chase him.
Having decided to support Ichiro rather than save the gas bag, I closed on the E111 and let rip, I saw the pilot jerk back in his seat as his plane lifted in the air, but seconds later he was back in control. Maybe I hit him, maybe not.
He was in a perfect position on Ichiro’s tail but didn’t fire, so I was right he must be jammed.
There was a loud crack in the air and I saw the Archie shell explode, not far behind Biff, who still had smoke streaming from his plane although I couldn’t see any flames yet. The CDL E111 was quite a long way behind him, maybe I could get a shot at him as well.
Another view of the Archie shell exploding.
Meanwhile the cameo Fokker had managed to avoid flying into the balloon and completed his turn.
Having Immeled he came straight back at the balloon, flying like a seasoned pilot and a canny one at that.
The turn must have thrown him off though because after a long burst of fire there was no apparent damage to the big grey thing.
Another Immelmann turn, he must be getting dizzy by now?
With no other target Ichiro opened fire on the German balloon but didn’t seem to do any damage. He’s a feisty pilot and no mistake, just what we need at this stage of the war.
I can see the blue Fokker, making a badly executed turn for home, I’m sure now that I’ve hit the pilot, I start to turn to port to get back to our balloon, but I’m way off. The thought goes through my mind that I’m going to catch it in the neck for this, but to hell with it, I saved Ichiro from the blue Fokker so that sits well with me.
Same place, just to show Ichiro pumping lead into the balloon as Biff is being out turned by the E111, this might get nasty.
Biff is in position and opens fire on the balloon as Ichiro tries to fly below it, there is some smoke but I think it’s actually dust as his bullets hit the balloon, everyone knows that balloons don’t smoke. The CDL Fokker did indeed turn inside Biff and causes some damage to the DH2 but the firing stops as his gun jams. Gun jams seem to be a feature of this fight so far.
Luckily Ichiro missed the balloon cable by a hairs breadth and survived what would have been a tragic accident, just as Biff comes in too fast to be able to fire at the gas bag again.
With some more neat flying Ichiro was on the tail of the E111, pumping lead into it with a vengeance and driving it away from Biff.
Having seen off the blue Fokker once I was surprised as I did a big turn to port to see him headed for home right in front of me.
Unfortunately we closed so fast that I didn’t get the chance to fire at him before we were past each other. The good news was that he didn’t get to fire at me either.
Back with the British balloon Walter Hubrich who is a master of the Immelmann turn has done another one and is flying back at our empty balloon. His gun must have been hot from the continual firing and this long burst caused another round to jam and his gun fell silent.
I just know he was thinking “I wish I’d brought that mallet with me, everyone knows that’s the best way to clear a jammed gun, and it doesn’t half feel good to be hitting something in that situation.”
I’ve finally decided that I need to attend to my prime objective which it protecting the balloon, I’m sure I mentioned that at some stage. Looking at the E111’s trajectory, I though a jammed gun is going to be the least of his worries in a minute.
Sure enough he collided with the balloon and both of them came away from it with absolutely no damage, probably a good job for me as by then I would have been so close I could have had my plane knocked out of the sky in the explosion.
As it was I narrowly missed colliding with the damn thing myself, I also missed colliding with the lucky cameo Fokker, maybe his luck is contageous.
Flying on instinct I avoided them both, but it was a very scary moment.
Damn me, looking over my shoulder I could see the blasted Fokker had Immeled again and it was only because his gun was still jammed that he wasn’t blowing lumps off the balloon and I was going the wrong way.
Then it happened - BOOOOM the balloon exploded, the Fokker was tossed around in the explosion but the pilot regained control, narrowly avoiding all the flying debris and when the smoke cleared he had flown out the other side of the vortex.
Upps, I guess I’m going to get the blame for this!!!
Over by the German balloon the AA gun had fired again and this time he had read the rule and understood it.
Biff had flown out from under the shadow of the sausage and Immeled right in the place that the canny German gunner had fired, a big bang as the shell exploded, badly damaging Biff’s plane but even worse putting shrapnel into Biff, will he get to play in the big cricket match? Even worse, to save time getting to the match after his mission he had carefully placed his cricket bat in the cockpit, just behind his seat, we just have to hope that didn’t get damaged either. I don’t think I mentioned that it’s a family heirloom and his Father played for the Gentleman’s Eleven for the MCC at Lords.
To take the pressure off Biff, Ichiro had turned on the CDL Fokker and was giving it a right hosing down until his gun jams, the E111 appears to have jammed his gun as well, he does not fire back!
They are a long way from me but I have a good view and see the two planes fly straight into each other, there is a loud explosion as the Fokker must have damaged something vital and Ichiro flies on virtually intact. Whoever said it’s better to be lucky than good must have been thinking of this incident at the time.
As Biff was turning for home, badly wounded though he was, the blue Fokker crossed his line of sight, he instinctively pressed the firing button, his bullets drilling a neat line in the engine cowling of his enemy.
Too little too late but it was close.
Bugger me if I didn’t see the blue Fokker do the same to Ichiro, who couldn’t fire back because he didn’t know of the mallet trick to clear his gun.
A few seconds later he had the gun jam cleared just in time to fire a burst into the balloon and see it explode right in front of him.
The CDL Fokker was headed for home and I let him go, well that is he was too far in front of me to catch him, Ichiro stayed on Biff’s wing all the way back home and I think he’ll fit into the flight very well.
I was first to land and climbed down from my plane just in time to see Biff and Ichiro walking over to me. Oh dear, this is where I get a earful from Biff, but before he could say a word Ichiro did a low bow in my direction and said “thank you for saving my life up there” I was a bit nonplussed to say the least, eventually I bowed back and said “nonsense, we would have all done the same for each other” Biff just smiled and said “come on the drinks are on me”. “What about your wound,” I replied, I could see blood on his trousers. He gave another smile, the cricket bat stopped the full force of the shrapnel, the bats a dud but I’m not” “Don’t worry, it was my fathers bat he was quite short and it never fitted me, I’m glad to be rid of it to be honest, but don’t tell him that should you ever meet.”
As we were approaching the hanger an AM1 came out to meet us, looking at Biff he said “Sir there’s a large box arrived for you from Naval 8, what would you like me to do with it.” “Just put it somewhere safe” Biff replied “It’s incendiary ammunition, a bit late for this mission but we may need it some time.” “Typical of the Navy, they always turn up late and claim the credit”
Well - we all survived which I think at this stage of the campaign is a bonus. Almost all of my pilots have returned now and are fit for duty any of them could have taken part in this mission but I wanted to introduce one of my new pilots 2/Lt Ichiro Takahashi and he performed admirably, as did the German pilot Walter Hubrich (Martin).
He’s played WoW before and supplied the very valuable plane that Ichiro was flying so I could field 3 DH2’s, his use of the Immelmann turn was masterly, I was going round in circles at the other side of the board getting no where, so it was good to see how it should be done, although I did have a secret smile when he flew into the balloon, I probably shouldn’t have admitted to that .
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