Flying Penguins.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

This thread has been started in order that other members may avoid the silly antics of certain officers, some of whom are old enough to know better, and Bumblie 3. who can now tell their jokes?:rolleyes: without interrupting serious threads. My profound apologies to any member who has been disturbed in this way.
Rob.

P.S. Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?

[gregbond77]

I don't know, why do penguins carry fish in their beaks? I have a funny feeling I'm going to be sorry I asked.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I don't know, why do penguins carry fish in their beaks? I have a funny feeling I'm going to be sorry I asked.

Because they don't have any pockets.:D:D:D
Rob.

[gregbond77]

Because they don't have any pockets.:D:D:D
Rob.

Then were do they keep the chips? You can't have fish without chips.:eek:

[richard m schwab]

Greg!
You have stump him!:):):):):)

Now i know what i have missed not having any children!:rolleyes:


Rich

[richard m schwab]

John!

Now we have he proper forum for this sort beneath Benny Hill humor, and he is retty deep!:rolleyes: For that do not PM Rob and tell him the joke you told me!:p:p:p:p


Rich

[richard m schwab]

Retaliation!
One day a penguin went into a police a station because his brother was missing. He said, "My brother is missing." "What does he look like?" says the policeman looking straight at the penguin.:)


Rich;)

[rrodrick]

I'm reading "The First Air War" by Lee Kennett. I just finished a section about French flight training. Pilots started in planes with clipped wings and 25hp engines that could not take off. They learned to hold the flight line going back and forth across a field. They called these training planes "penguins." Imagine my surprise when this thread had nothing to do with them! :)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Then were do they keep the chips? You can't have fish without chips.:eek:

In the newspaper of course.:D:D:D
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I'm reading "The First Air War" by Lee Kennett. I just finished a section about French flight training. Pilots started in planes with clipped wings and 25hp engines that could not take off. They learned to hold the flight line going back and forth across a field. They called these training planes "penguins." Imagine my surprise when this thread had nothing to do with them! :)

That was the inspiration for the title Rodrick. You will soon get used to our quaint and obtuse sense of humour. Flying a penguin, a bit like flying a kyte (KITE) to see who will latch on to the thread, or in Penguineese, take the bait. Going fishing?
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Rob.
So its 2am, and a man and wife are roused by a loud banging at the front door.
The husband goes down and opens the door to find a penguin, swaying to and fro.
"What do you want?" asks the man.
"Please could you give me a push, I can't do it on my own?" replies the penguin.
"Its 2 in the morning - shove off!" says the man, and slams the door shut.
He is halfway upstairs when there is another loud knock. He goes back and jerks the door open.
"Please mister, help me. Give me a push?"
"I won't tell you again, now clear off!" he shouts and goes back to bed.
His wife asks him what was happening. He tells her that was a penguin asking for help, and from the smell of its breath it may have been drinking.
"Well that's mean, dear!" says his wife, "One day your car may break down and you might need a push, I think you should help the poor little bird!"
From the tone of her voice he knows this is not going to go away, so he goes down to help.
He opens the door, but there is no sign of the penguin.
"Hey, penguin, do you still need that push?" he calls.
"Oh, yes please!" the penguin calls back.
"Well where are you?" asks the man.
"Over here on your garden swing!" replies the penguin.....

John

[gregbond77]

Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they are afraid of Wales.
What do you can a penguin in the desert?
lost.

[richard m schwab]

John!

Now that is what i call a Penguin JOKE!!!:):):D:D

Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

John!

Now that is what i call a Penguin JOKE!!!:):):D:D

Rich

More like a shaggy Penguin story if you ask me. What a punch line.:D:D:D:D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Two penguins are standing on an ice flow. One is wearing a bow tie. A freighter come to halt nearby and lowers a boat, which rows over to the flow.
"Hey, you with the bow tie!", calls a sailor, "We've got a package for you."
"Thank you." says the penguin with the bow tie and collects the parcel.
As the boat rows away, he sits down on the ice and unwraps the parcel. Inside is a box, which he carefully opens, and removes a beautiful pair of Morroccan slippers.
"Who sent you them?" asks his friend.
"Sears & Roebuck." says bow tie. " I sent for them."
"Why??"
"Cos my feet are b****y freezing!"....

John.

[Gaz67]

Why are there no polar bears at the south pole??

The Penguins ate them all.

I know another, but it's really long, a bit crude and is best told after a few beers...

p.s. Opus rocks...

[bumblie3]

A somewhat inebriated gentleman wanders into a Police station. The desk sergeant asks him if he needs any assistance.

"Do any penguins live around here?"
"No sir, I believe they mainly live in the Antarctic."

"Have you had a report of a penguin escaping from a local zoo?"
"No, sir." The sergeant replies politely. "May I ask why?"

"Well, my wife says I've just run over a nun, but I think she's winding me up."

[bumblie3]

Two young penguins, Albert and Sidney, are chatting one day, when a young female penguin, Ermytrude waddles up to join them. Now Ermyntrude has unusual marking for a penguin, in that she is all white, with a black throat and tummy.

"What are you chaps talking about?" she asks.

"Well," says Albert, "we were just thinking how lucky we are to live here, lots of lovely fish to eat, right to hand."
"Don't you get fed up with fish? Wouldn't you like some venison, or maybe a MacDonald's for a change?" says Ermyntrude.

"Well, think of the lovely steeps slopes we can slide down." says Sidney.
"Yes, bur look how dangerous they could be for tiny chicks." replies Ermyntrude. "Just think about how much harm they could do to themselves on those dangerous slopes."

"Well, look at how well we are suited to the climate." Albert comments.
"Well, I'd like to be somewhere where I could lay back and sunbathe, in really hot sun, without whatever I am lying on melting." Ermyntrude replies.

Just then, Ermyntrude's mummy calls her for her lunch.

As she waddles away, Albert says to Sidney, "Don't you think Ermyntrude is a bit negative??"

John.:rolleyes:

[bumblie3]

I'm reading "The First Air War" by Lee Kennett. I just finished a section about French flight training. Pilots started in planes with clipped wings and 25hp engines that could not take off. They learned to hold the flight line going back and forth across a field. They called these training planes "penguins." Imagine my surprise when this thread had nothing to do with them! :)

Sorry Rick,

Although this thread is not entirely about trainee pilots, as you quickly spotted, I think you will find it does got back and forth, over the same ground, rather a lot.;):):):):o:o

Happy landings,

John.

[richard m schwab]

John!

You have surpassed yourself with "Ermytrude" go to the head of the class!:):D;):):D


Rich

[bumblie3]

Rich
Aw shucks!!:o:o:o

John.

[richard m schwab]

John!

You deserved that flipper on the shoulder!!!;)


Rich

[Guntruck]

http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=200&pictureid=4050&commentid=357#picturecomment357

[richard m schwab]

Steve!

That is great!:) The best of both worlds!:)


Rich

[bumblie3]

Steve, perfect!
John.

[gregbond77]

Steve, great picture!

[Flying Officer Kyte]

That's classic. It made me fall about laughing more than the jokes. Yes I am back and will get around to ticking you all orf when I have had my tea, after being stuck in an R.T.A. hold up for two hours on the way back from holiday. Thanks for all the good wishes Catch up with you all individually soon.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Welcome back, Kytey - I think.....:rolleyes:
John.

[Guntruck]

He's back! Quick, hide the booze (and the meths, and the castor oil) :D

[Flying Officer Kyte]

- I think.....:rolleyes:
John.

My word ! Things have changed a lot in a week. :rolleyes: Must go on leave more often.
Kyte.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

He's back! Quick, hide the booze (and the meths, and the castor oil) :D

I'm surprised there is any left to hide after a whole week.
Kyte.

[Snowy]

Welcome back, glad to see you at the console again!

[gregbond77]

Welcome back Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Welcome back, glad to see you at the console again!

Thanks Snowy. Guess what it will take to really console me? Just being a bit /
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Welcome back Rob.

Thanks Greg. It's great to be back. To the bar all my wingmen.
Rob.

[Guntruck]

Sadly Rob has had a few in the mess and couldn't stay upright :D

[bumblie3]

Steve, its a bit disrespectful to flip Rob off. Now I see why he calls you his WING man!:D:D:D:D:D
John.

[Guntruck]

Purely accidental, I assure you. Slapped him on the back, congratulated him on his promotion (well, it must be all of 5 days since the last one so he must be due one :D) and there he was, gone :eek:

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Purely accidental, I assure you. Slapped him on the back, congratulated him on his promotion (well, it must be all of 5 days since the last one so he must be due one :D) and there he was, gone :eek:

Straight down the ice slide and into the pool. Still it's better than being stood up again by those army types in the Land Rovers. Next Harrier comes over and you're down again.
Kyte.

[richard m schwab]

Steve!

That is great, the sort of high toned thing we expect here! The Castor oil is on me, on the rocks of course!:)


Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Steve!

That is great, the sort of high toned thing we expect here! The Castor oil is on me, on the rocks of course!:)


Rich

So now you are trying to give me the slip too, eh Rich!
If the castor oil is on you that much you need to get a bigger windshield. Try the new SE5 ones when they arrive. Flying in a greenhouse should stop you throwing stones.:D
Rob.

[Guntruck]

Thanks for the additional rep Rob. Didn't know penguins were so useful! :D

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Thanks for the additional rep Rob. Didn't know penguins were so useful! :D

Additional rep! I must have pressed the wrong button. I thought it said rap, as on the knuckles. Must get my eyes seen to. Oh I did! It looks a long way to the bar.:(
We had better get started then.:)
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

Rob!

Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, it just might take you to another tunnel!:p But that is another slippery slope!:D Off to the bar at last!:D


Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob!

Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, it just might take you to another tunnel!:p But that is another slippery slope!:D Off to the bar at last!:D


Rich

I once saw the light at the end of the tunnel Rich, but it turned to be someone with a lamp bringing me extra work.:(
Rob.

[Guntruck]

I usually find the light at the end of the tunnel is a train coming the other way!

[Banor58]

A Penguin, down on his luck, asks another Penguin "Can you lend me six squid?"


A Penguin walks into a bar and orders a Gin and Tonic. The Bartender says, "That will be twenty quid". He puts the drink on the bar and says, "You know, we don't get many Penguins in here". The Penguin replys, "With prices like these, it's no wonder".

[richard m schwab]

Chris!

That is why i come here great jokes!:)


Rich

[bumblie3]

Speaking og Harriers and Penguins.....
Two penguins are lying sunbathing on an iceflow when a Harrier jet zooms overhead, comesto a hover and then hurtles vertically upwards and disappears.....

"WOW! Said the first penguin, "I wish I could do that!"
"You probably could," said his friend, "if someone set fire to YOUR armpits...."

John.

[richard m schwab]

John!

You have done it again wing man!:):D:):D:)



Rich

[bumblie3]

A bunch of older penguins are standing in group, chatting, when a very young male waddles by. His gait is erratic and every few yards he spins round in a complete circle, stops, shakes one leg and then shuffles on.
"What's up with him?" asks one elder, "Is he trying to dance?"
"No" Says the oldest penguin, "I've seen it before in young males - he's just feeling a bit footloose!"

[Flying Officer Kyte]

A bunch of older penguins are standing in group, chatting, when a very young male waddles by. His gait is erratic and every few yards he spins round in a complete circle, stops, shakes one leg and then shuffles on.
"What's up with him?" asks one elder, "Is he trying to dance?"
"No" Says the oldest penguin, "I've seen it before in young males - he's just feeling a bit footloose!"

Aftre that you are going to deserve everything you get Bumblie.:eek:
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Why did the penguin cross the road?

[Guntruck]

Oh, the suspense is killing us.......

[bumblie3]

Why did the penguin cross the road?

Because it saw a Zebra crossing?

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Because it wanted to go with the floe. :D
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

Rob!

Why did the Penguin cross the road at a Zebra Crossing? Were there no Penguin crossings there? Or was he a crossed eye Penguin!:)

Rich

[bumblie3]

Rich,
In the UK pedestrian crossings are marked by alternate black and white stripes across the road (pavement) and so are called Zebra crossings. We so have Pelican crossings. If he was a good penguin and did as his mummy told him he would have used the Zebra crossing, but this was obviously a very willfull young penguin who was trying to be cool by going with the floe. Tch! He will have to join me in the naughty corner..... like, man.
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob!

Why did the Penguin cross the road at a Zebra Crossing? Were there no Penguin crossings there? Or was he a crossed eye Penguin!:)

Rich

Because he was like me and the blind antelope, Rich.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Really Kytey - NO EYE DEER???
And you say I deserve all I get??
Cor!
John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Really Kytey - NO EYE DEER???
And you say I deserve all I get??
Cor!
John

Yes John! and that was just the horses doofers. :D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Two penguins are waddling down the road. One glances to the side and whispers out of the side of his beak "Did you see that cat eyeing us hungriily?"
"Blimey!" said his pal, "A talking chocolate biscuit!"
John.

[richard m schwab]

John!

Would the cat enjoy a bowl of milk after the Penguins!


Rich

[bumblie3]

I'm sure it would Rich, but it may have problems dunking the penguins till they go soft.:D
John.

[Coog]

The commanding officer of a British fighter squadron was celebrating his birthday at the Officers' Club. As a joke, several of his subordinates chipped in and bought the CO a penguin and had it delivered to the Officers' Club. The CO, not wanting to offend his men, accepted the penguin. He then told a Yank pilot who had just reported for duty, to take the penguin to the zoo. The Yank was not seen for the rest of the day. Later that evening, the Yank showed up at the CO's home with the penguin in tow. The CO said "I thought I told you to take the penguin to the zoo!". The Yank replied "I did take the penguin to the zoo! He liked it so much I'm going to take him to the museum tomorrow!"

[bumblie3]

A penguin returns home for the New Year's holiday. Standing talking to a friend he sees a small bedraggled little bird, waddling towards them, with it plumage covered in white stripes.
"What's that about?" he asks.
"That's Ercy, he's a very bad Enguin. He stole the other chicks Christmas Resents, and sold them to the crew of a Assing freighter. The stripes are to show he's on Robation."
"Ercy, Enguin, Resents, Assing, Robation?? Have you got a fishbone stuck in your beak?"
"Or course not - everybody knows there's no Ps for the wicked......"

[richard m schwab]

John!

That was almost as bad Bobby`s! I see you are starting to crack up in there! That or are the Penguins are telling you Jokes!

One day in Sunny Southern California, a man is on a business trip driving down the interstate. He sees a billboard sign and thinks he is seeing things! five miles later he sees the same billboard sign, it reads Visit the Little Sisters of Charity Whorehouse! and tells you it is 45 miles ahead and gives the exit number! As he drives along the signs are spaced every five miles and count down the distance! He finally sees the exit and get off. There are signs pointing the way down a two lane road! After about two miles he comes to a Stone walled compound with a gravel parking lot! A sign in bold letters Little Sisters of Charity Whorehouse free parking! He parks his car and approaches a large wooden door with a sign giving the hours and a come on in greeting. He enters and is greeted by an an elderly nun sitting at a desk who smiles ans says, Welcome my son! He asks the obvious question, Is this p[lace for real? The nun replies yes and the wages of sin are $75.00 cash or credit card, no checks she smiles! The man pays and is told to go through a door and wait for a sister to help him! He walks into an empty waiting area and takes a seat! After several minutes a much younger nun walks in tells him to follow her and gives him instructions to have a seat in a small sitting area with five doors each has red and green light bulb over the door! She informs him to wait till the next green light comes on ad enter that door! After a short wait a green light come on and he enters! He is in a small hall way leading to another door, a small sign reads knock and enter!
The next thing he knows he is looking at his car in the parking lot. There in big letter is a sign. You have just been screwed by the little Sisters of Charity come back soon!!:):)

Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rich.
You may tell risque jokes about nuns on the penguin thread as they are slightly related, but don't get into the Habit, :D:D:D:D
Rob.

[Guntruck]

I'll have a go at working out the stats for his card. :D

[bumblie3]

Yippeee!! Yes, please Steve! :D
I think I've heard about these. I believe they use snow ramps for launching, but disguise them as ski ramps. I'm told the give away is when you see a tiny ice floe, with a ramp, being positioned and anchored. Apparently the pilots use webbed feet for flaps and airbrakes. I had heard that they were to be armed with SMGs for aerial combat, but have shelved the idea for the moment as they can't get their flippers into the trigger guards. i never thought I would be lucky enough to see a photo of one. I hope they are not on the secret list, and you are in breach of some regs or other?:eek:
Carry on with the good work, Agent X.:cool:
John.;)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I'll have a go at working out the stats for his card. :D

That is an amazing picture of an early Penguin Scout in action. It looks like an early version of the SE 2.5 stealth penguin. You can tell this from the angle of the droop beak, and the slight back rake on the flippers. This was a feature unique to the 2.5.
From the cammo, I would hazard that it is on a polar egg laying mission. The picture is even more impressive as only three of these birds were ever built, and hence photos are very rare. There is some controversy, however, over the exact colour of the bird as only black and white pictures exist. Some of the colours at first thought to be red may in fact be of a greenish hue. As no roundels are apparent, I cant say for sure which of the allies it is flying for. The later French two seater version was considered to be a match for an Albertros, but this is of course pure conjecture, as the Cold Thaw put a stop to all further air activity.
I will forward a copy of this picture to the Times newspaper forthwith.
F.O. Kyte. Basingstoke.

[richard m schwab]

Gentleman!:eek:


Now i know why i come to this exciting post every day! To keep abreast, awing and athigh of the latest breaking news!:

To imagine how such a top secret project was executed and to see the photographic proof with my one good eye!:)

Thank you one and all for sharing your input!:p


Rich

[Snowy]

Are you sure this is a scout?
I do believe it had bombing capabilities. It was not sanctioned by any accord as it was considered a more heinous weapon than mustard gas.
Once hit by that deadly ordinance, it was all over.
No, I mean all over!
Thank goodness cows don't fly. ;)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Are you sure this is a scout?
I do believe it had bombing capabilities. It was not sanctioned by any accord as it was considered a more heinous weapon than mustard gas.
Once hit by that deadly ordinance, it was all over.
No, I mean all over!
Thank goodness cows don't fly. ;)

Sorry to contradict you Snowy but you are confusing the 2.5 with the 2.55 extra B
This is a common mistake, as Bill Oddie points out in his Book "Warbirds and Twitchers over the Pole" On p 34 para 3 he says " not only were the flight feathers longer on the 2.55 extra B but the engine could be feathered for a slower approach on the bombing run." As you know white guano bombs were later banned by an international birdwatchers treaty as weapons of mess destruction.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

I'm not sure you're right Kytey. Weren't the pilots of the 2.55 extra B required to wear 'Biggles' type flying helmets? It is quite obvious from the photo that this chap isn't - unless your are suggesting that the photo has been tampered with in some way, by the boffins (baffins?), to confuse the enemy? No, I think I am safe in saying that this photo is an unretouched original of the Scout in flight. Damn good work Guntruck, my lad, if you are quick I'll buy you a pint in the mess.
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I'm not sure you're right Kytey. Weren't the pilots of the 2.55 extra B required to wear 'Biggles' type flying helmets? It is quite obvious from the photo that this chap isn't - unless your are suggesting that the photo has been tampered with in some way, by the boffins (baffins?), to confuse the enemy? No, I think I am safe in saying that this photo is an unretouched original of the Scout in flight. Damn good work Guntruck, my lad, if you are quick I'll buy you a pint in the mess.
John.

You are actually backing up my hypothesis here Bumblie old fruit. I was the one who spotted that it was a Scout. Snowy thought it was a bomber.:rolleyes:However i take your point that the Baffins may have done some inbreeding to confuse the enemy.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

You are actually backing up my hypothesis here Bumblie old fruit. I was the one who spotted that it was a Scout. Snowy thought it was a bomber.:rolleyes:However i take your point that the Baffins may have done some inbreeding to confuse the enemy.
Rob.

Kytey,
Having read the information about Baffins, at the following link:-
http://www.thetoque.com/020827/baffin.htm
I would no longer put anything past the little brutes! I mean to say, you couldn't make it up, could you?

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Kytey,
Having read the information about Baffins, at the following link:-
http://www.thetoque.com/020827/baffin.htm
I would no longer put anything past the little brutes! I mean to say, you couldn't make it up, could you?

John.

It is obvious from your research, that we need to recruit at least one squadron of Baffins at once in order to counteract the long range raids by the Walrus float planes.
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

Rob!

Was that MKI or the MKII Walrus float plane! The I`s were under powered and tended to belly in! The II`s had the a larger wing area and three JATOL bottles! From my reading the II`s also used had an improved radar system!


Rch

[Snowy]

Now I am sure that this would be classified as a bomber.

Thanks to Bumblie's research it clearly states a design feature best suited to high altitude arctic type conditions with long range capability, and is rumored to have destroyed an entire community, allegedly.

No scout I know of is capable of that. :cool:

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob!

Was that MKI or the MKII Walrus float plane! The I`s were under powered and tended to belly in! The II`s had the a larger wing area and three JATOL bottles! From my reading the II`s also used had an improved radar system!


Rch

I t was, as you so rightly say, the MKII Rich. Sorry for not being more precise with my details, as I assumed that everyone concerned would be aware of the fact that it is the long range capability of the latter beast, which has caused such a crisis. Its predatory nature has eaten into the supply of fish stocks that we may have to proceed with rationing. This is even if we run convoys of fish shoals protected by Martlets and Skuas flying long range sorties from their nests on each side of the pond. The only way to cover the gap is with carrier pidgeons based on icecrete seabird carriers, based in mid pond.
Please investigate the logistics of this plan and get back to me soonest.
Respectfully yours F.O. Kyte. (Acting S.L.O.B.) Seabird Leiason Officer Britain.

[bumblie3]

It is obvious from your research, that we need to recruit at least one squadron of Baffins at once in order to counteract the long range raids by the Walrus float planes.
Rob.

Speaking of Walri (walruses?) Rob....
Two escape from a New York Zoo. The two males found their way south to the Antartic and found themselves resting on a small ice floe. suddenly the smaller of the two, who had been born in captivity, noticed a solitary penguin, climb up onto the ice.
"Is that FOOD dad?" he asks. "Keep your voice down!" says his father.
"Why is he wearing a Tuxedo dad?" "Good manners,son, after all, I did ask him to come for dinner......" :):):):):):D:D:D:):):):);)

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Speaking of Walri (walruses?) Rob....
Two escape from a New York Zoo. The two males found their way south to the Antartic and found themselves resting on a small ice floe. suddenly the smaller of the two, who had been born in captivity, noticed a solitary penguin, climb up onto the ice.
"Is that FOOD dad?" he asks. "Keep your voice down!" says his father.
"Why is he wearing a Tuxedo dad?" "Good manners,son, after all, I did ask him to come for dinner......" :):):):):):D:D:D:):):):);)

John.

Just proves my point John. They are a direct threat to our Penguin Scouts. Your intelligence about them having long range capability in order to get from New York to the Antarctic is indeed disturbing. I will call an emergency meeting of the Joint W.C. (War Council) to formulate a response. Meantime, I will send a couple of Kittiwakes on recon.
Kyte.

Oh! the joke. Yes very good.:D:D

[bumblie3]

To tell the truth, Rob, it is the Walrus's aerial capabilities that worry me! Machine guns, bombs and hand grenades I can take in my stride but, has anyone considered what those tusks can do to light timber and canvas in close combat. One of our Kittyhawk spy craft managed to get the attached photo of one shortly after re-armimg(re-tusking?), and it looks pretty intimidating to me!!:eek::eek::eek::eek:
Thank god for khaki breeches.:o:o:o:):):):):D:D:D:D:D

John

[bumblie3]

Sorry Rob, looks like the netbook I am using in hospital is affecting what I can upload. I see the walrus pic wasn't It may be because my ASUS runs on a version of Linux but it goes through all the steps including upload. So goodness knows what it screwing up.
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Sorry Rob, looks like the netbook I am using in hospital is affecting what I can upload. I see the walrus pic wasn't It may be because my ASUS runs on a version of Linux but it goes through all the steps including upload. So goodness knows what it screwing up.
John.

John, didn't realize you had caught a packet. Hope it is not too serious old chap. Get well soonest.
In the meantime let me update you.
Using our latest Whale sonar, we intercepted what looked like a school of flying fish heading our way, so I sent out a dolphin to intercept. We thought it was led by the Red Barracuda himself, but when the Dolphin got near enough he discovered that it was just a red herring.
Hope that cheers up the spirits a bit old fruit.
Best wishes F.O. Kyte.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

John, didn't realize you had caught a packet. Hope it is not too serious old chap. Get well soonest.
In the meantime let me update you.
Using our latest Whale sonar, we intercepted what looked like a school of flying fish heading our way, so I sent out a dolphin to intercept. We thought it was led by the Red Barracuda himself, but when the Dolphin got near enough he discovered that it was just a red herring.
Hope that cheers up the spirits a bit old fruit.
Best wishes F.O. Kyte.
Rob.

You are right Rob, that did cheer me up. Once the Red Barracuda got a mention, I knew the Herring wasn't far behind - et voila! as our French allies are wont to say, there he was.:D:D:D
Hopefully, I will be home tomorrow or early next week. I broke my fistula, and ran into all sorts of problems in being dialysed whilst they built a new one out of Teflon tubing.I think I'm now a teensy bit bionic. :eek:
I've wound up with a clot in my left groin, that will take months to disperse, and my left leg is currently twice the diameter of my right. I look like half of me is an upside down model of Popeye..... Half my right hand is numb, the thumb and tips of three fingers, but they expect all feeling to return in time.:D
You may have to take off without me for a few days, so watch your six o'clock.:(
Thanks for the good wishes.;)
John.

[Coog]

I think I found a cause we all could rally to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PAZRYrNaCY

[bumblie3]

True Bobby, I think we should all rally to this tragic cause. I believe these are early symptoms of Penguin Pilot Fatigue.
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

In the meantime to cheer you up and for your delectation, here is a photo of one of our scouts developed for escort duty taking off from one of our new icecrete penguin carriers somewhere in the Atlantic.:cool:
Kyte.

[bumblie3]

In the meantime to cheer you up and for your delectation, here is a photo of one of our scouts developed for escort duty taking off from one of our new icecrete penguin carriers somewhere in the Atlantic.:cool:
Kyte.
Are you sure Rob, or is he just trying to recover his bow tie which has obviously become unraveled and fallen off??

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Are you sure Rob, or is he just trying to recover his bow tie which has obviously become unraveled and fallen off??

Only a teething problem I assure you. I am more concerned by those skiving ground crew just standing about and watching.:mad:
Rob.

[bumblie3]

To tell the truth, Rob, it is the Walrus's aerial capabilities that worry me! Machine guns, bombs and hand grenades I can take in my stride but, has anyone considered what those tusks can do to light timber and canvas in close combat. One of our Kittyhawk spy craft managed to get the attached photo of one shortly after re-armimg(re-tusking?), and it looks pretty intimidating to me!!:eek::eek::eek::eek:
Thank god for khaki breeches.:o:o:o:):):):):D:D:D:D:D

John
Here is the photo I tried to append earlier....
John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Here is the photo I tried to append earlier....
John

Now I'm worried John.:eek:
Rob.

[Guntruck]

Which one is you? :D

[Guntruck]

http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=251

:p

[bumblie3]

http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=251

:p
I love them both Steve.:D:D:D:D:D
On the first card I can just imagine Kytey about to break into...
"The Wings Are Alive With The Sound Of Music.....":D:D:D:D:D:D
On the second card he looks exactly as though someone has just offered him a free drink....:rolleyes::):D;)
Thanks for the thought.
John

[bumblie3]

Which one is you? :D
Whilst at the present moment my stature is similar to that of the walrus, and we both have a similar gait, the truth is, I am not actually in the snapshot. So my identity remains a secret! (Sound of the William Tell overture fading out....)
"Who was that masked man?":confused:
"Bumblie3 dad.":)
Nope doesn't quite have the ring to it one would expect, does it?:(

Head down Bumblie3 waddles off, failing to kick a stray cat - Chizz...

John

[Guntruck]

Head down Bumblie3 waddles off, failing to kick a stray cat - Chizz...

John

Wheelie bins are so much handier ;)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=251

:p

Exqusite.:rolleyes:
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

On the second card he looks exactly as though someone has just offered him a free drink....:rolleyes::):D;)
Thanks for the thought.
John[/QUOTE]

No chance of that with you lot of tight fisted penguins.:p
Kyte.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

How about that for the latest model! :cool:
Kyte.











Look at the size of that tank!

[bumblie3]

I'll take three. Do you suppose the Col does a suitable flight stand for this model?
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I'll take three. Do you suppose the Col does a suitable flight stand for this model?
John.

I'm sure he will if you ask him nicely.:rolleyes:
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

:)What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Star fish.:rolleyes:
John

[Guntruck]

You two shouldn't be let out on your own

[bumblie3]

They said you had a white coat Steve.....:D:D:D
John

[Coog]

Nice to see the flying penguin thread is alive and well. I was beginning to think John and Rob had given up drinking or something.

[bumblie3]

So, these three little penguins are stumbling home from a convivial evening in a local bar, when they are jumped upon by several walruses. They awaken next morning to find themselves shackled to a long wooden bench behind the sweep of a long oar. Dozens of other penguins sit around them in the same condition, and they realise they have been press-ganged.
Suddenly a seal at the rear of the gangway starts to beat a steady rhythm on two large kettle drums and walruses armed with whips begin to move amongst them thrashing anyone that doesn't appear to be making enough effort. Mealtimes come and go and each is given a small fish and a mug of water which they must eat and drink without breaking stroke. With back breaking strain they force the galleon through the water at 3 knots and the beat settles on this stroke rate for the rest of the day.
At last evening comes, the beat slackens and stops, and eventually the wonderful sounds of anchors being dropped can be heard.
The three little penguins collapse over their sweep. "That's a good idea." says a penguin in the next row. "Save your strength for tomorrow. Today we were resting, but tomorrow's a bit different."
"Why is that?" pants the littlest penguin.
"Ah, well, its the Captain's birthday, and he wants us to take him water-skiing!" says his neighbour.

John

[Coog]

A Yank walks into an English pub with a penguin and they both sit down at the bar. The bartender asks, "Where did you get that thing?" The penguin replies, "In America, there are millions of them!"

[bumblie3]

Nice one Bobby.
John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Hi Bumblie.
I just knew those Walrus were trouble, even in those days.
Bye the way, you never told me if those penguins eventually got the approval of the seal. :D:D:D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

No but they got the Walrus's Seal of Approval. Mind you, two thumbs up from a Walrus can be very painful, so I am told.
John.
http://thumb9.webshots.net/t/76/176/0/12/0/2831012000105944169vrAfJw_th.jpg (http://entertainment.webshots.com/photo/2831012000105944169vrAfJw)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

No but they got the Walrus's Seal of Approval. Mind you, two thumbs up from a Walrus can be very painful, so I am told.
John.
http://thumb9.webshots.net/t/76/176/0/12/0/2831012000105944169vrAfJw_th.jpg (http://entertainment.webshots.com/photo/2831012000105944169vrAfJw)

It is not its thumbs I am worried about.:eek:
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

Rob!

No wonder that little guys eyes are crossed!:):D:):D


Rich

[bumblie3]

A young penguin ventriloquist is working in various clubs and one
night he does a show in a small town.
With his little penguin dummy on his lap, he starts going through
his routine of dumb blonde jokes.

Suddenly, a blonde woman in the audience leaps to her
feet and starts shouting:

"We've all heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes.
What makes you think you can stereotype women that way?
What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her value
as a human being? It's guys like you who keep blondes from
being respected at work and in the community, and
from reaching their full potential as a person.
You and your kind continue to perpetually discriminate
against blondes, and all in the name of humor!"

The embarrassed penguin begins to apologize,
and the blonde bellows, "You stay out of this, bird!
I'm talking to that little little idiot sitting on your lap!!";)

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

A young penguin ventriloquist is working in various clubs and one
night he does a show in a small town.
With his little penguin dummy on his lap, he starts going through
his routine of dumb blonde jokes.

Suddenly, a blonde woman in the audience leaps to her
feet and starts shouting:

"We've all heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes.
What makes you think you can stereotype women that way?
What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her value
as a human being? It's guys like you who keep blondes from
being respected at work and in the community, and
from reaching their full potential as a person.
You and your kind continue to perpetually discriminate
against blondes, and all in the name of humor!"

The embarrassed penguin begins to apologize,
and the blonde bellows, "You stay out of this, bird!
I'm talking to that little little idiot sitting on your lap!!";)

John
Thanks for that John. Now we Know why his eyes were really crossed.:eek:
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

John!


You have done it again!

Rich

[bumblie3]

Why do penguins throw snow balls?
So they have somewhere to dance...
What did the ocean say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved...
John

[Coog]

A blind penguin walks into a pub and makes his way up to the bar. He hops up on a stool and orders a drink. As the bartender brings him his drink, the penguin shouts "Does anyone want to hear a walrus joke!" The bartender leans over and and in a low voice says "Watch it, there is a walrus sitting on the stool to your left, another one sitting on the stool to your right, and three sitting at the table behind you. All five have been drinking all evening, have bad attitudes, and are itching for a fight. Do you really want to tell that walrus joke?" "I don't think so" says the penguin loudly, "I don't want to have to explain it five times!"

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Get in line you orrible little man.
Kyte.

[bumblie3]

Nice one Bobby.
John.

[richard m schwab]

Bobby!


The groan heard around the world!:D I heard that one told with a blind sailor and five Marines in the bar!;)



Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Bobby!


The groan heard around the world!:D I heard that one told with a blind sailor and five Marines in the bar!;)



Rich
What goes round comes round, Rich. I keep hearing updated versions of jokes that were going around college 40 years ago, :eek: and they are still just as bad.Note to self. Must get a new script writer.
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

Rob!

You are correct.:) The one i mentioned is the least politically incorrect!;)

Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob!

You are correct.:) The one i mentioned is the least politically incorrect!;)

Rich
Nice to know my memory hasn't gone completely then. Erm whoever you are.:confused:
Oh yes that's right. Richard something or other.
Rob. Or is it Kyte? :confused::eek::cool:;):D:confused::confused::rolleyes::mad::p:(:confused::confused:

[Dom S]

Blimey - was that last post a copy of your mood changes for the day...?

[bumblie3]

A fishmonger leans on the counter near the end of day when a penguin with a basket in its beak pushes its way through the door.

"What's all this?" asks the fishmonger. The penguin knocks the basket against the fishmonger's shins.

"Stupid bird!!." said the fishmonger but, as he reaches down to smack the penguin around the head, he notices a note and a ten pound note in the basket.

The message on the note asks for 3lb of best cod. The fishmonger thinks this is a good opportunity to get rid of some of his older stock and he goes to the window and reaches for the dried up stuff that's been sitting there all day.

The penguin lets out a load squawk at him and pecks him sharply on the knee. The fishmonger glares at the penguin then limps over to the fridge and gets the best cod from the fridge. He takes out about 2 1/2 pounds, and plops it on the scales, along with his thumb.

Again, the penguin squawks and gives him a sharp peck on the other knee. "Ouch!," yelped the fishmonger and he adds an extra fish, taking it well over 3lb. He wraps it up, drops it in the basket, and drops in change from five pounds. The penguin lunges at him pecking him fiercely on both knees. The fishmonger puts another five pound note in the basket.

The fishmonger is very impressed and decides to follow the penguin to see where he goes. Down the street they go with the fishmonger limping along behind.The penguin enters a block of flats, pushes the lift button, enters the lift, and then does a little leap in order to press the button for the 10th floor.
The fishmonger goes to the adjacent lift and follows to the 10th floor. He sees the penguin walk down the corridor and bang on a door with the basket. The door opens, and the penguin's owner throws open the door and starts yelling at the penguin.

"Hey, what's up? That's a really smart penguin you've got there," calls the fishmonger.

"What do you mean, smart?" yells the owner, "that's the third time this week he's forgotten his ruddy key!!!"....:D:D:D:D:D

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Blimey - was that last post a copy of your mood changes for the day...?
Don't know Dom. Can't remember that far back.:confused:
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

John!

Oh thank you John.:rolleyes: Now i have had a perfect day!:D


Rich

[Warhorse47]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff303/Kevin-Andra/courage.jpg

[Flying Officer Kyte]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff303/Kevin-Andra/courage.jpg

Now I have had a perfect start to the day.:) Thanks Kevin.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Brilliant Kevin.
John.

[bumblie3]

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

John
No Just a P45. :D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

A penguin spots a recruiting poster for the police force, and waddles off the local station. They only ask him one question - "What would you do if you had to arrest your mother-in-law?"
"Call for backup!!" They recruited him immediately.
John

[flash]

Could this be a poster for a special ops penguin?
http://www.campusgifts.co.uk/acatalog/PenguinofDeath-LG.jpg

[Pope]

Could this be a poster for a special ops penguin?
http://www.campusgifts.co.uk/acatalog/PenguinofDeath-LG.jpg

Hope he is on the allied side in Time of Aces in Jan.

Cheers Aled

[Guntruck]

The dastardly Germans have recruited Feathers McGraw for Time of Aces

[Flying Officer Kyte]

The dastardly Germans have recruited Feathers McGraw for Time of Aces
You think he's a problem! Just look at what our latest Recon mission has dug up.

[Pope]

You think he's a problem! Just look at what our latest Recon mission has dug up.

Is that Shaun's latest mini to take on his heavy bombers?

[bumblie3]

1) Alvin the penguin was somewhat unusual, in that he couldn't swim. One day, he slipped on the ice and fell into the sea. Before he could be rescued, he drowned. His friends had a whip round and bought him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt.... Well, they thought its what he would have wanted...:D:D:D:D


2) Penguin police report that the penguin who steals fish by size is still at large.:o:o:):):):D:D:D:D

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

A penguin was passing the drug store when he decided he wanted to go in. He walks in the door (ring ring ring, waddle waddle waddle) he waddles up to the counter. 'Can I help you mister penguin?'
'Yes, do you have any plums?'
'No, penguin, this is a drugstore.'
'Thank you.' The penguin leaves (waddle waddle waddle)
A while latter the penguin passes by again and once again goes inside. (ring ring ring, waddle waddle waddle) He waddles to the counter. 'Excuse me, do you have any plums?'
'NO, penguin! this is a drug store!'
'Very well then, thank you.'
'If you come back in here again penguin, I will nail your cute little feet to the floor.'
'Oh, well, thank you' The penguin waddles out the door.
A while latter the penguin goes back into the store. (ring ring ring, waddle waddle waddle) 'Excuse me sir.'
'WHAT!!!!!!????????'
'Do you have any nails?'
'NO! penguin, this is a drug store!!!'
'Oh, well then, do you have any plums?' :D
Rob.

[Coog]

Dead Penguins. Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica – where do they go?

Wonder no more!!!

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life.

The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into and buried.

The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:

“Freeze a jolly good fellow.”

“Then they kick him in the ice hole.”


You really didn’t believe that I know anything about penguins, did you!

[bumblie3]

I like playing draughts (checkers) with penguins, but you wouldn't believe how hard it is to find 12 albinos...
John

[Pope]

John, the boys have voted this their top penguin joke so far but have you any more penguin mother-in-law related jokes by any chance.
Cheers Aled


A penguin spots a recruiting poster for the police force, and waddles off the local station. They only ask him one question - "What would you do if you had to arrest your mother-in-law?"
"Call for backup!!" They recruited him immediately.
John

[bumblie3]

John, the boys have voted this their top penguin joke so far but have you any more penguin mother-in-law related jokes by any chance.
Cheers Aled

Try these Aled.

1) What is the ideal weight for a penguin's mother-in-law?
3lb 2oz (including the urn).;);););)

2) 2 penguins are chatting when the first's mother-in-law passes.
'Blimey!' said the second, 'She looks even more miserable than usual.
What's up?'
'She's had some really bad news, they refuse to allow her into Vegas for
the international poker tournament!'
'Why ever not?'
'They say she won't take the chips off her shoulder!!':):):):)

3) A penguin was sitting on the edge of the ice flow when he saw six
strange penguins beating his mother-in-law up. As he sat watching,
his neighbour, rushed up and said, "Well, aren't you going to help?"
The penguin replied, "Nope. I reckon six of them is enough".:o:o:o:o

4) What does a penguin do if he find he is missing his mother-in-law?
RELOAD, AND TRY AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!:D:D:D:D

Cheers,
John.

[Pope]

Thanks John,

Just what I needed for the next family gathering of the wifes clan;).

Cheers,

Aled:)

[bumblie3]

The penguins have taken up curling and are busy practicing on the ice. Little Alfred keeps whining about never getting a turn, so eventually, he is allowed his go. He struggles to even move the heavy stone, but manfully he wiggles from side to side until the stone starts to move. Suddenly he and the stone start to revolve, and as he spins faster and faster, the stone rises from the ice, and flies out of his flippers, flattening both sweepers, and causing all the other penguins to leap for safety.
When the referee regains his feet he screams that Alfred is disqualified.
Alfred stands alone, head down and crestfallen. Then hopefully, he raises his head and asks 'Don't I score anything for getting two birds with one stone?'
John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Thanks John,

Just what I needed for the next family gathering of the wifes clan;).

Cheers,

Aled:)
Don't encourage him Aled. :(
Oops! Too late.
Rob.

[richard m schwab]

John!

Well done indeed.:) Two birds with one stone!:rolleyes:


Rich

[Flying Officer Kyte]

John!

Well done indeed.:) Two birds with one stone!:rolleyes:


Rich
Now you are encouraging him as well Rich. We will now be plagued with Penguin jokes forever if he thinks he has an audience.
There is only one recourse left. We will have to give him the BIRD.:D:D:D.
Rob.

[bumblie3]

A penguin talks his way onto the staff of his local zoo and on his first day he goes to the head keeper and asks what he wants him to do. The head keeper tells him to clean out the tropical fish tank.

So he is busy scrubbing the sides of the tank with all the brightly coloured tropical fish darting about, when a great big monstrous fish swims up and bites his flipper. He tries to shake it off but it won't let go and in desperation he starts to hammer the creature against the side of the tank.

Eventually it lets go but only in its death throws. It floats to the surface and the penguin groans. First day on the job and he's killed one of the exhibits. Suddenly the penguin has a flash of brilliance and decides he has to get rid of the evidence and the lions look like the best bet because they will eat anything.

He scuttles off to the lions' enclosure and while no one is looking he lobs the fish over the fence where it is devoured by the lions.

Whistling nonchalantly the penguin goes back to the head keeper and asks what he wants him to do next. The head keeper tells him to sweep out the monkey cage. So he is merrily shovelling up the muck from the bottom of the monkey cage when - splat! a large turd hits him on the back of the neck. He turns around to see a pair of chimpanzees howling with delight at their new game.

The penguin warns the monkeys off and tries to carry on cleaning the cage, when - Splat! Splat, two more turds bounce off his head and in a rage, the penguin takes a swing at the chimps with his shovel and batters the two chimps stone dead.

"Oh, Walruses!" thinks the penguin, "Now, look what I've done, what am I going to do?" Once more the lions come to mind. If they worked once, why not give it another go? He drags the dead monkeys to the lion enclosure and tosses them over the fence where the lions pounce on them, and scoff the lot..

Again the penguin goes to the zoo keeper a nd asks what wants doing next. He is told to collect the honey from the hives of some killer bees. No one told him about protective clothing. He is busy pulling the honey filled boards from the beehive until a bee stings him, then another and another until the whole swarm of bees is buzzing angrily around his head. In a panic he lashes out with the honey filled board and batters every last bee into a pulp. "Oh, Walruses!, Not Again!!!" he thinks and as you might expect, he again throws the evidence into the lion enclosure, where they are devoured by the lions.

The next day a new lion is delivered to the zoo. He strolls into the lion 's enclosure and meets the rest of the lions.

"Hello" he says.

"Afternoon" say the other lions.

"What's it like here then?" asks the new lion.

"Not bad" say the other lions.

"Food OK?" asks the new lion hopefully.

"Not half, yesterday we had fish and chimps and mushy bees!"

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

A penguin talks his way onto the staff of his local zoo
John.

Nice one John.:D:D:D:D
Rob.

[Dom S]

I actually laughed out loud at that one. I hate myself for it.

[bumblie3]

Mummy Penguin is sitting with her baby, by a fishing hole when suddenly the water errupts from the hole! Seizing her little one she rapidly retreats, as an elephant seal emerges from the hole and rushes towards them. He overhauls them rapidly, and in desperation, the mother turns, faces him square on and roars like an angry Polar Bear. The elephant skids to halt, stares at the penguin for a second and then turns and rushes back to the ice hole and dives in.
Mother turns to her little one and says, 'See how important it is to learn a foreign language?!?'
John.

[bumblie3]

Two walruses boarded a plane for a holiday in the States. One sat in the window seat
the other sat in the middle seat.

The aircraft is held up waiting for the final passenger to board.Just before take-off,
a penguin, dressed in holiday clothes waddled up to the plane, got on and took the only
free seat,the aisle seat, next to the two walruses.

The penguin kicked off his shoes, sighed with relief, wiggled his feet and was settling
in when the Walrus in the window seat said, "I think I'll get up and get a coke."
"No problem," said the penguin, "I'll get it for you."

While he was gone, the walrus picked up the penguin's right shoe, hawked and spat into
it.

As the penguin arrived back and went to sit down, the second walrus remarked that the
coke looked great and he thought he might go and get one.

Again, the penguin obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the second walrus
picked up the penguin's other shoe and spat in it. The penguin returned and they all
sat back and enjoyed the rest of the lengthy flight to America.

As the plane was landing, the penguin slipped his feet into his shoes and knew at once
what had happened.

"How long must this go on?" the penguin asked.

"This fighting between our races? This hatred? This animosity?
All this spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?"...
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Two walruses boarded a plane for a holiday in the States.

"This fighting between our races? This hatred? This animosity?
All this spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?"...
John.

Not quite the way I originally heard it John, but far more P.C. (that is Penguin correct)
Rob.

[MayorJim]

Ah! I loved the fish and chimps one...way too funny :D

[bumblie3]

How do penguins catch polar bears?
They cut a hole in the ice and line the edge with peas.
When a polar bear bends over to take a pea, the penguin creeps up behind and kicks him
in the icehole....
John

[Charlie3]

...we had fish and chimps and mushy bees!"

John.:D:D I can't stop snickering...there are likely few of us "Yanks" who get the mushy bees bit but I think it makes the joke! My wife was just over here at the computer because of my laughing at another joke in a different thread to see what was so funny, at this rate she's going to make me shut it off!

[bumblie3]

Sorry Charlie, I would hate to think of you having your missus cut off your thread! I guess fish, chips and mushy peas IS peculiarly 'British'. Glad it amused you.
Cheers,
John.

[bumblie3]

Check this - I wish I could dance this well!!:(:(:(
http://tapespace.com/view/Dancing_Walrus
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Check this - I wish I could dance this well!!:(:(:(
http://tapespace.com/view/Dancing_Walrus
John.
Nice one John.
I've seen that guy with the big moustache before. Same guy different routine.:D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

How do you make a penguin float?
Add two or three scoops of penguin to a glass of soda.

Are penguins expensive to keep as pets?
Nope! They mainly live on ice!

John

[bumblie3]

A penguin gets lost in a storm, and trying to outrun it, swims north. After weeks of
travelling he sees an icy shore before him and he happily waddles onto the ice. He
doesn't realise he has reached the Arctic, and wanders around squeaking and squawking to try to summon some friendly penguins. Suddenly a Polar Bear appears round a hill of
snow and charges up to the penguin, who drops to his knees and starts to pray. To his
amazement, the Polar Bear also kneels down and starts to pray. The penguin cries,
"Hallelujah! It's a miracle!" The polar bear opens one eye and says "Please don't talk
while I'm saying grace."
John.

[bumblie3]

A tiny penguin and his dad went out fishing one fine morning. After a few quiet hours
sitting on the ice, the tiny penguin became curious about the world around him. He
looked up at his dad and asked "How do fish breath under water?"

His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, "I really don't know, son."

The little penguin sat quietly for a while longer, then turned back to his dad and
asked, "Dad, how does ice float on the water?"

Once again daddy penguin considered the question before replying, "Darned if I know, son."

Looking around him, the tiny penguin asks "How come the sky is blue, dad?"

After some thought, his dad replies. "No idea, son"

The inquisitive penguin, worried he was annoying his father, asks this time "Dad, do
you mind that I'm asking you all of these questions?"

"Of course not son." replied his dad, "How else are you ever going to learn anything?

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Very amusing John.:D
Now tell me more about Grace.;)
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Rob,
Not much to tell. She turned out to be too tall for me. I used to have to stand on a box. One day it collapsed as we were saying good night. You could say, I fell from Grace!! :o:o:o:p:p:p:p:D:D:D:D:D:rolleyes:

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob,
Not much to tell. She turned out to be too tall for me. I used to have to stand on a box. One day it collapsed as we were saying good night. You could say, I fell from Grace!! :o:o:o:p:p:p:p:D:D:D:D:D:rolleyes:

John
There I just knew it had to be a bird you were with. What with your fixation on penguins and all.:D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Yup!
Bumblie3

[bumblie3]

Two penguins are sitting together on a n ice flow when one of them notices sharks circling a female penguin who has got herself into difficulties. He begins to get up to waddle to her rescue when the other penguin grabs his flipper and holds him back.

The penguin says,"Why are you holding me back? We have to go rescue that penguin!"

To which the other replies, "Don't worry. That penguin is my mother-in-law."

"Are you trying to kill her?" shrieks the first penguin.:eek:

"It a tempting thought but, just you watch!":)

Just then, the sharks position themselves beneath the struggling penguin, and lifting her on their backs, carry her all the way to shore, depositing her safely.

"How on earth did you know that would happen?" asked the first penguin
.
"Professional courtesy.":D:D:D:D:D

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Two penguins are sitting together on a n ice flow when one of them notices sharks circling a female penguin who has got herself into difficulties. He begins to get up to waddle to her rescue when the other penguin grabs his flipper and holds him back.

The penguin says,"Why are you holding me back? We have to go rescue that penguin!"

To which the other replies, "Don't worry. That penguin is my mother-in-law."

"Are you trying to kill her?" shrieks the first penguin.:eek:

"It a tempting thought but, just you watch!":)

Just then, the sharks position themselves beneath the struggling penguin, and lifting her on their backs, carry her all the way to shore, depositing her safely.

"How on earth did you know that would happen?" asked the first penguin
.
"Professional courtesy.":D:D:D:D:D

John.
Some mother in law, some penguin. Same bird I gave you last time.:p
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Why do penguins bury their mothers-in-law 18 feet down, instead of the usual 6 feet?:confused:

Because somebody told them that, deep, deep down, mothers-in-law are really quite nice....:rolleyes:

John.

[richard m schwab]

John!

Stop it my ribs are cracking! Are you wearing a spooner and twirling a cane as you write these?:D:):D

Rich

[bumblie3]

Some mother in law, some penguin. Same bird I gave you last time.:p
Rob.

So, that's 2 raspberrys Rob? Is this a new low in my level of achievement?
John.

[bumblie3]

John!

Stop it my ribs are cracking! Are you wearing a spooner and twirling a cane as you write these?:D:):D

Rich
You've got me there Rich. I'm not familiar with a spooner. If its early American slang for a straw hat(?) then the answer is nope! Its raining today, so I'm wearing my Sou'wester. As for twirling a cane while I type, just imagine the typos, besides I would probably knock my cuppa char over- Blasphemy!! Is that what you Colonial chappies wear if you type a joke. I remember reading somewhere that you guys have a uniform for everything.:D:D:D:D:D:D
John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

You've got me there Rich. I'm not familiar with a spooner. If its early American slang for a straw hat(?) then the answer is nope! Its raining today, so I'm wearing my Sou'wester. As for twirling a cane while I type, just imagine the typos, besides I would probably knock my cuppa char over- Blasphemy!! Is that what you Colonial chappies wear if you type a joke. I remember reading somewhere that you guys have a uniform for everything.:D:D:D:D:D:D
John.
Cor. Luv a duck. Mary Poppins. That image of Bumblie with a straw hat and cane reminds me of **** Van Dyke.:D Or was it that dance with the animated penguins that did it ? :D:D
Rob.

[bumblie3]

Cor. Luv a duck. Mary Poppins. That image of Bumblie with a straw hat and cane reminds me of **** Van Dyke.:D Or was it that dance with the animated penguins that did it ? :D:D
Rob.

You have to admit, Rob, that penguin chorus line certainly made Duck Van Dyke look good - well, as good as anything could!!:D:D:D
John.

[Warhorse47]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff303/Kevin-Andra/bugspenguin.jpg

[bumblie3]

Just perfect, Kevin.
John.

[bumblie3]

An young penguin, in desperate need of money, decided to hire himself out as a handyman. He began, door to door, canvassing a wealthy neighborhood for work.
He went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs
to be done.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"

The penguin said, "How about 10 dollars?" The man sniggered to himself, agreed and told
him that the paint and everything he needed were in the garage. A short time later,
the penguin came to the door to collect his money.

"You're finished already?" the owner asked.

"Yes," replied the penguin, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it a second coat."
Stunned, the man handed over the $10.

"And by the way," the penguin called over his shoulder, as he waddled through the gate,
"that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari!"....

John.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Oh. John.:eek:
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Just in. Picture of Bumblie in his new D.J.:D
Rob.

[Archidamus]

At the risk of proving to my girls that others agree my jokes are c**p

Did you hear about the Emperor Penguin? He abdicated, so now he's just Mr. Penguin.

[bumblie3]

Welcome Brian, your daughters should be in awe of you....
John.

[bumblie3]

Just in. Picture of Bumblie in his new D.J.:D
Rob.
WoW Kytey, don't I look smart??:rolleyes::D:D:D:D:D
John.

[Guntruck]

Question or statement? :D:D:D

[bumblie3]

A young penguin and his father escape from the zoo and wander into a shopping mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The penguin asked his father, "What is this, dad?"

Dad, (never having seen an elevator), responded "Son,I have never seen anything like this in my life, I've no idea what it is!"

While the penguins stand watching wide-eyed and beaks agape an old woman on sticks, hobbles up to the moving walls, and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady hobbles between them into a small room. The walls closed and the small penguin and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. Facinated, they continued to watch as the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again and a beautiful 21 year old woman stepped out.

The father bent over and whispered to his son, "Quick, go back to the zoo and fetch your Mother!":D:D:D:D:D

John

[Archidamus]

Clearly I have to plumb new depths.

In Penguin society, the upper class are called Fountain-Penguins; the middle class Ball-Point Penguins; and the working class Pencilguins!

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Clearly I have to plumb new depths.

In Penguin society, the upper class are called Fountain-Penguins; the middle class Ball-Point Penguins; and the working class Pencilguins!
I expect you are looking for the aproval of a seal for that joke then.:D
Rob.

[Archidamus]

Well, my penguin jokes are krillingly funny :)

[bumblie3]

Catching, isn't it???

[Boney10]

He He, now where is my flying harness to clip myself to the bar. Here is £50 pour me out when it gone :)

[bumblie3]

Allow me to hold that glass for you, old chap.....:D:D:D:D:D;)

[Archidamus]

If we are going for a drink in the Mess, I suggest we have some pasta to soak up the alcohol.

Apparently they have a new shape invented at the South Pole - a fusion of Penne and Linguine called ..... wait for it, wait for it ....... Penguine (tada)

[bumblie3]

i thought that was pretty tasteless.
Pasta la vista!

[Flying Officer Kyte]

i thought that was pretty tasteless.
Pasta la vista!
No just past a joke.:p
Rob.

[Archidamus]

In my defence, not my joke - I got it from that lass Anya

[Archidamus]

Did you hear about the penguin who invested in a seafood farm?

When he sold it a few years later, he was squids in :0

(My girls are threatening to leave home if my jokes don't get better)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

(My girls are threatening to leave home if my jokes don't get better)
You should be so lucky.:)
Rob.

[The Cowman]

http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/picture.php?albumid=316&pictureid=5571

[bumblie3]

Must have really been travelling to hit the cat that hard!......
John.

[bumblie3]

A penguin is waddling home one evening, when he is pounced on by two polar bears.

Holding him down, they tape his beak shut, and one punctures the top in several places, with his claws. The bear then tucks him under his arm, and he and his friend wander off to meet up with some other friends. There the penguin notices one bear holding a walrus with an oar shoved up his rear end to keep him stiff, with his whiskers stretched taut and firmly attached to its tail, whilst yet another bear has set two oil drums on end. The remaining bear disappears behind a wall of snow and then reappears dragging a seal by its tail, and carrying a pair of sturdy bones.

With one foot holding the seal in place, he proceeds to hammer on its ribs as though they were the keys of a xylophone.

The one with the oil drums starts to beat out a syncopated rhythm, whilst the one with the walrus, stands it on its tail, and plucks it like a double bass.

The one with the penguin holds its rear to its mouth, starts to huff, puff and blow rasperries, and to the penguin's amazement, when the bear fingers the hole in his beak, he proceeds to play red hot Dixie-Land Jazz.

After about half an hour of playing, the bear plays a particularly complicated passage, and suddenly there is a loud explosion, and pieces of the penguin flutter to the ice.

"Darn it!" says the bear, wiping goo off its face. "That's the trouble with these homemade clarinets, they just don't last. That's the third I've had burst on me this week"...

[Archidamus]

Ouch - that hurt!

Two penguins are courting, and for a date the boy penguin takes his girlfriend to the edge of the ice flow. He doesn't pay her much attention, and after a while she dives in and swims under the water.

He is surprised when she surfaces a few minutes later without any fish, but muttering "you look lovely tonight, dear". Puzzled, he asks what she is doing - and she replies "fishing for a compliment" (boom, boom)

[bumblie3]

A penguin receives a huge brown paper parcel through the mail. Half an hour later he emerges from his igloo wearing a very snazzy tam-o-shanter, and carrying a full set of golf clubs over his arm. His wife stands at the door with a scowl on her beak, as he stops to wave at her. As he wanders off, a friend stops him.

'What are you doing with all that gear?' asks the friend. 'You don't know how to play golf!'

'I know that!' said the penguin. ' I'm really only annoying the wife! She's convinced I'm going off to enjoy myself...'

John

[richard m schwab]

John!


Perfect!:) You have done it again John!:):D:):D


Rich

[bumblie3]

The Amazing Golf Ball

Two penguins went out to play golf on the local links and were about to tee off, when the first penguin notices that his opponent only had one golf ball.

"Didn't you bring another golf ball, just in case?" asked the first penguin.

The second penguin replied that no, he only needed this one.

"Are you sure?", the friend persisted. "What happens if you lose that ball?"

The other guy replied, "This is a marvelous golf ball. I won't lose it so I don't need another one.":confused:

"Well," the friend asked, "what happens if you miss your shot and the ball goes in the lake?";)

"That's okay," he replied, "this special golf ball floats. I'll be able to fish it out.":p

"Well what happens if you hit it into the trees and it gets lost among the bushes and shrubs?":)

The other penguin replied, "That's okay too. You see, this special golf ball has a homing beacon. I'll be able to get it back -- no problem.";)

Exasperated, the friend asks, "Okay. Let's say our game goes late, the sun goes down, and you hit your ball into a sand trap. What are you going to do then?"

"No problem," says the other penguin, "you see, this ball is florescent. I'll be able to see it in the dark."

"Suppose its snowing and you hit it off the fairway into a snow drift? You'll never see the white ball in the snow.!"

"Like I said, no problem, the ball turns red an it puts up a little homing beacon mast with a beeper on the top, which sounds until the ball is picked up!" says the second penguin.:)

"Blimey!!" says the first penguin, amazed.:eek:

Finally satisfied that he needs only the one golf ball, the first penguin asks, "Hey, where did you buy a golf ball like that anyway?"

The other guy replies, "Oh, I didn't buy it, I found it.":D:D:D:D:D

John

[Flying Officer Kyte]

And again.:D:D:D:D
Rob.

[MayorJim]

John,

I think I've golfed with that penguin a few times m'self ;)

[Archidamus]

That's par for the course (tada)

[Lucky Bryan]

Why don't Elephants like penguins?


Because they can't get the wrappers off....:)

Lucky.

[bumblie3]

Four penguins strap on ice skates, and set off to race around the island. Reaching the first corner in line abreast, they hurtled into the turn. One slammed flat on it's face and skidded into a steep drift. Two spectators rushed out to help, dragging him feet first, from the drift.
As they stood him on his feet, one noticed a lettuce leaf sticking out of the scater's bottom...
"Look! Look!" points out the first in excitement. "Relax!", replies the second, "I think it is just the tip of the iceberg!"

[bumblie3]

Four penguins strap on ice skates, and set off to race around the island. Reaching the first corner in line abreast, they hurtled into the turn. One slammed flat on it's face and skidded into a steep drift. Two spectators rushed out to help, dragging him feet first, from the drift.
As they stood him on his feet, one noticed a lettuce leaf sticking out of the scater's bottom...
"Look! Look!" points out the first in excitement. "Relax!", replies the second, "I think it is just the tip of the iceberg!"

[Archidamus]

A penguin fell through a window, breaking the pane of glass.

He offered to call a glacier!

[Wolf]

I think when you stop flying this is what you become a penguin. Grin.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

The Director of Rolls Royce is driving home in his Silver Wraith through the snow one night, when he catches sight of a bedraggled looking penguin sitting at the side of the road flippering for a lift. It is such a bad night that he stops and winds down his automatic window." Hop in". He says." I'll give you a lift to the nearest Zoo".
As they bowl along he offers the penguin a drink from his travelling drinks cabinet. "Wow". Says the penguin," I never saw anything like that before". The director then lights a cigar from the electronic lighter. "Wow says the penguin that is astounding". Just then he sees the button on the glove compartment. "What does this do?" He says. "Press it and you will see". Says the director. The penguin presses the button and the compartment opens with hardly a sound. Inside is a C.D. "What is this for?" Asks the penguin. "Put it in that slot and listen". Says the director. "Wow!" The penguin amazed at the quad sound filling the car. Then he spots a golf tee at the back of the glove compartment. "What is that for?" He says. The director answers. "It is for resting your balls on when you drive off".
"Wow!" Says the penguin. "Rolls Royce think of everything ".:D
Rob.

[The Cowman]

Gawds these are terrible... hilarious... but terrible! :cool:

Being an obviously "uninformed" American, (sometimes we Americans forget that the rest of the World is out there... I know, I know... you are finding that hard to believe... :rolleyes: ) I find myself doing internet research trying to understand the obession with penguins here... still no clue... but I did find these:

http://shop.cafepress.com/british-penguin

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Gawds these are terrible... hilarious... but terrible! :cool:

Being an obviously "uninformed" American, (sometimes we Americans forget that the rest of the World is out there... I know, I know... you are finding that hard to believe... :rolleyes: ) I find myself doing internet research trying to understand the obession with penguins here... still no clue... but I did find these:

http://shop.cafepress.com/british-penguin
Those are fantastic Ken. Wait till Bumblie sees them. I have a good idea what the T shirt design for the British flights will now be based upon.:D
For me it all started when a friend of mine who was a Falklands War Veteran told me about the Harrier Jump Jets and Penguin down.
Rob.

[The Cowman]

Those are fantastic Ken. Wait till Bumblie sees them. I have a good idea what the T shirt design for the British flights will now be based upon.:D


I know I am not in a British Flight, but can I be an honorary Brit? When you get the shirts figured out, I would like to purchase one. Size 3x (So I have room once I accidentally shrink it in the dryer...) :)

[Wolf]

Q: Why don´t you see Penguins in Britain?

A: Because they´re afraid of Wales.

[The Cowman]

Q: Why don´t you see Penguins in Britain?

A: Because they´re afraid of Wales.

Oh great... I say "Size 3x"... and William makes a joke about "Whales"... I see how it is now! :rolleyes:

[McKeever]

A guy walks stumbles into a gin-joint, pale as a ghost and looking quite distressed. He sits at the bar and the bartender, seeing the man is shaken asks:

"Hey buddy, you look kinda troubled. Something I can help you with?"

"Yeah," the guys says. "First give me a drink. A double of your strongest stuff."

The barkeep complies. The guy downs it in one gulp.

"So buddy," the bartender continues. "What happen?

"I...I just an an accident with my car. I wasn't paying attention and I think I hit something at the crosswalk," the patron answers.

"Wow, sorry to hear that." The bartender sympathizes. "Here have drink on the house. It'll steady your nerves. Anything else I can do?

"Yeah, there sure is. Tell me, how tall is a penguin?"

The bartender shrugs, then puts his hand about two feet from the top of the bar. "I dunno, about like this maybe?"

"OH...MY...GOD!", the guy puts his face in his hands. "They were Nuns!!"

:D

[The Cowman]

I could not resist... I had to find one...

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"

"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."

...I'm sorry... it was the best one I could find involving a cow! :eek:

[tonyc206]

I could not resist... I had to find one...

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"

"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."

...I'm sorry... it was the best one I could find involving a cow! :eek:

Ken you should be udderly ashamed of yourself :D

A baby penguin goes up to his mum and says "Mum am I a penguin?"
"Of course you are son" replies his mother.
Not happy with the response he persists to ask again "Mum, am I really a penguin?"
"Of course you are she replies again, adding "I'm a penguin, your dad's a penguin, so you're a penguin and if you don't believe me ask your dad"
So the baby penguin goes of to find his dad and asks again "Dad am I a penguin?"
Dad replies "Of course you are son and a very handsome one you are to. Just like your old dad"
The baby peguin is still not happy and once agan asks "Dad, am I really, realy a peguin?"
Dad replies again"Yes of course you are son. Your Mum is a penguin, I'm a penguin and together we had you so you are a penguin. See?"
The little baby penguin hangs his head and says "OK Dad" in a very dis-believing tone.
Dad is bewildered and asks "Why do ask if you are really a penguin son?"

.......and the bay penguin responds.......

"Because I'm f***ing freezing"

[Wolf]

Q: What do you call a penguin in the desert?
A: Lost.

[tonyc206]

I though I saw a singing Peguin today, but it was just a (w)rapper

[Wolf]

Speaks for it self. A standing sort of landing.

Wolf

[Warhorse47]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff303/Kevin-Andra/penguin.jpg

[Wolf]

Good one ACE.

Wolf

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Speaks for it self. A standing sort of landing.

Wolf
I would have said a stunning sort of landing.
Rob.

[Flying Officer Kyte]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff303/Kevin-Andra/penguin.jpg
I have come across a lot of WoW pilots with the same problem as the Penguin.
Rob.

[The Cowman]

:D You know Dasher and Dancer, and Prancer and Vixen,
Comet and Cupid, and Donner and Blitzen,
But do you recall, the most famous penguin of all? :D

[Flying Officer Kyte]

:D You know Dasher and Dancer, and Prancer and Vixen,
Comet and Cupid, and Donner and Blitzen,
But do you recall, the most famous penguin of all? :D
You missed out Randolph the brown nosed reindeer who ran behind Ruldoph the red nosed reindeer. He could run just as fast as Rudolph, but couldn't stop as quickly.:D
Rob.

[The Cowman]

Here is another one from Randy Glasbergen (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Glasbergen):

7169

[Wolf]

Check flight. Wolf

[The Cowman]

I could use a laugh or two... this thread needs waking up!!! :D

[Flying Officer Kyte]

I'll get back to you on that , as the bishop said to the actress.
Rob.

[Guntruck]

Check flight. Wolf

Late for the party, William? :D:D:D


http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/showthread.php?1840-Flying-Penguins.&p=24839&viewfull=1#post24839

[Jager]

Thank goodness cows don't fly. ;)

Don't be so sure:eek:
http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=342&attachmentid=7083
http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=335&attachmentid=8099
Karl

[Attila57]

Don't be so sure:eek:
http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=342&attachmentid=7083
http://www.wingsofwar.org/forums/album.php?albumid=335&attachmentid=8099
Karl

... and he flies very well!

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQDH4058Lvu2Li6tcDnB65dZrpot5CL4XkB5Hom4RDagHPUYw0DKTplio4 (http://www.google.it/imgres?imgurl=http://www.looks-cool.co.uk/games/img/Club%2520Pinguin.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.looks-cool.co.uk/games/Club-Pinguin.html&usg=__Awe0St1q9fRPdJozrs2KLZ5rQ0g=&h=262&w=350&sz=67&hl=it&start=73&zoom=1&itbs=1&tbnid=45fbTkOgw6K52M:&tbnh=90&tbnw=120&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dpinguin%26start%3D60%26hl%3Dit%26sa%3DN%26gbv%3D2%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1&ei=62M4TYezHseV8QO-04SnCA)

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Thank goodness cows don't fly. ;)
8305

Well there you go again, and I had no G&T. this time.:(
Rob.

[The Cowman]

8305

Well there you go again, and I had no G&T. this time.:(
Rob.

I gotta get me one of those!!! ;)

[Attila57]

I think we've to send a NOTAM. They're everywhere!

http://b5media_b4.s3.amazonaws.com/65/files/2007/12/flyingcow.jpg

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQnEWd1RVXMk1333lPAZmyzlO1aPUURib5yOMP18VRNsc5-X75s2gDTzDWM

http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT7vUODWntG5-2OzvUx5JRb60tnWHf-rjnRrD-6krEalgFE2eKUXZzMcumK

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRWB7wKVT4uRysIO7OtcFQGQmvxmcr_tE1WYTqcYSy3XAPdKmPa
http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRnDugbT5hL51GMZbNk1PXqluUw5hoKIzpLiPuWkwEHdYfal9rJGg

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Can anyone find an udder one of these?
Rob.
Posts quick reply, then runs away.

[Archidamus]

Rob,

All you need to do is visit a vinyard - they are the fruit of the Bo Vine :)

Brian

[Flying Officer Kyte]

Rob,

All you need to do is visit a vinyard - they are the fruit of the Bo Vine :)

Brian
Thanks Brian, but there is enough of the mad cow about me already. However talking of vines puts me in mind of something? Are yes!
To the bar.
Kyte.

[bumblie3]

In absolutely every case, everything reminds you of drinking, Kitey!;)
What a shame we've lost most of our better icons. How very sad. The site's going down hill.:(:(:(
bumblie3

[Jager]

In absolutely every case, everything reminds you of drinking, Kitey!;)
What a shame we've lost most of our better icons. How very sad. The site's going down hill.:(:(:(
bumblie3

Then you will just have to import some