Crikey! I didn't know Kitey had a twin!!!
Crikey! I didn't know Kitey had a twin!!!
Heh Heh Heh I luv Penquins.
Rob
Slow Time player for Windows is SOP!!
Rich
Standard Operating Procedure I suspect.
Do you like penguins?
Really?
Moving penguins?
See this:
http://papercraftsquare.wordpress.co...ercraftsquare/
Superb Quim.
Just like the stuff I used to design with my year eight class for mechanisms, although nobody as I recall made a penguin.
Rob.
"Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death."
I love this little paper machines.
I build them and them I always end up giving them and feeling sorry not to have filmed them working.
This Penguin is a must do. (After 234 WW1 planes I have to build...)
Couldn't help myself. If you see this:
You'll want to build this:
http://papercraftsquare.wordpress.co...ercraftsquare/
Just sayin'...
I may be wrong, though...
...
Q: What does a penguin get from sitting too long on the ice?
A: A bad case of Polaroids!!
I thought this thread was frozen Baz!
Q. What do penguins drive ?
A. Arcticulated Trucks
Rob.
"Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death."
John
We had to defrost this one again!
Rich
What do penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow!
Run for your life - there are stupid people everywhere!
Keep the Humor and martini`s dry!
Rich
Q. How do penguins get rid of unwanted polar bears?
A. Peck a large hole in the ice, and keep pointing at the water, as though they had spotted something. When the bear bends over to take a closer look, they kick it in the icehole!!
I recently heard an unusual call to Car Talk. Car Talk is a long running car advise program on NPR Saturday Morning. The hosts answer car questions sometimes right always funny. This particular Saturday morning a caller was looking for advice about the vehicle he used on his Sunday morning drives. The ride was so rough he had to have his seat belt on at all times. They ask all the normal questions. Make , model the sort of roads he drove on and speeds he drove. He said it was a big off road vehicle, that sat 15 people. He always drove slow it would buck and throw you around any faster. They asked if the tires were over inflated. The answer was, he did not maintain it that was someone else` s job. They finally asked was driving. The answer was the ice fields in Antarctica.
Rich
A penguin was driving his car down the highway when steam began to pour out of the hood. He pulled into a repair shop and asked the mechanic to fix his car. The man said to come back in half an hour. So while he waited the penguin went across the street to the bar, and ordered a glass of milk. Since penguins don't have hands to hold glasses, he spilled some milk on his beak. When he returned to the mechanic, he asked what was wrong with his car.
The mechanic said it looked like he blew a seal.
A bloke was driving down the road when he saw a broken-down truck with the driver peering under the hood keenly watched by a group of penguins. The truck driver flagged him down, gave him $200 and asked him to take the penguins to the zoo.
The truck was eventually fixed and the driver was returning to home base when he spotted a queue outside the local cinema. In the middle of the queue was the bloke he had given the $200 to AND all the penguins.
He screeched to a halt, jumped out and shouted 'What do you think you are doing here - I asked you to take the penguins to the zoo!'
The bloke replied 'I took them to the zoo, still had some money left over so I decided to take them to the pictures as well!'
Come off it Rich, you don't expect us to believe someone would be daft enough to drive to Antarctica to farm ice do you?. I mean to say, just imagine trying to water the ice just to make it grow?? And how do they harvest it, then?? It couldn't be economical, when you can grow your own in a freezer. Tch! Pull the other one....
John.
John
Have you ever heard of global warming! Farmers down there make big bucks keeping that ice growing! Big spreads need big rigs!
Rich
Rob
Perish the thought! Warm gin, the shortages aren't that bad yet!
Rich
Here!Here!Give that man a double! I have heard the theory that we are in an Ice Age. Only the man made internal combustion engine is keeping it at bay! This of course keeps the barley and junipers growing and the Gin flowing!
Rich
What do Penguins eat for lunch?
Icebergers.
See you on the Dark Side......
Why don't Polar Bears eat Penguins?
They can't get the wrappers off.
See you on the Dark Side......
Re Global Warming!
Canberra just had the coldest winter for about 43 years!
Sad if you've perused 680 posts to work that one out. I'll try better next time.
See you on the Dark Side......
This tread is like the joke about the old vaudevillians home. A grandson of one of the retirees comes for a visit. All the old Top Banana`s are sitting around talking. One of the group yells number 65, the whole group starts laughing. Another says number 20. This cracks them all up. The grandson looks confused and asks grandad what is going on. The old guy says, we know all the jokes and numbered them years ago. He whispers a number in the kids ear and tells him to take a turn. The kid says number 125, and the whole room groans. Really confused he asked what was wrong. The answer from everyone is, kid it not the joke. It`s how you tell it!
Rich
Rich
Actually there is a postscript to that one!
After a few more random numbers are called out with various levels of laughter, one old fellow calls out 399 & the whole audience erupts!
The grandsons says "That must have been a good one!" to which his Grandfather replies "Oh it wasnt too bad its just they had never heard that one before!"
That joke being nearly as old as myself, let's get back on topic because here is one which is older than even Kyte.
Q. What's black and white and has eight wheels ?
A. A penguin on roller skates.
Rob.
"Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death."
What goes "Now you see me, now you don't.", "Now you see me, now you don't.", "Now you see me, now you don't!"??
A penguin playing on a zebra crossing.
Rob
That reminds me of an old joke! One day young penguin wakes to find himself standing at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter smelling of fish greats the little fellow. What happened? Why am i here? Saint Peter reply's you were a good little fellow in your day and deserve being here. A killer whale you could not out swim , that brought you here. Thank you, exclaims the penguin. Peter tells him. In haven we do not Have killer whales. Since you little fellows walk slow, we give you roller skates. Thank you again Peter, i know i will be fast on those. Not long afterward Peter hears a blood curdling scream and sees the penguin skating for all his worth. As he flies by, he yells. Peter, why did you give the polar bears skates!!!!
Rich
Rob
That reminds me of an old joke! One day young penguin wakes to find himself standing at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter smelling of fish greats the little fellow. What happened? Why am i here? Saint Peter reply's you were a good little fellow in your day and deserve being here. A killer whale you could not out swim , that brought you here. Thank you, exclaims the penguin. Peter tells him. In haven we do not Have killer whales. Since you little fellows walk slow, we give you roller skates. Thank you again Peter, i know i will be fast on those. Not long afterward Peter hears a blood curdling scream and sees the penguin skating for all his worth. As he flies by, he yells. Peter, why did you give the polar bears skates!!!!
Rich
Similar tale, Rich, 3 penguins go to heaven. St Peter says that heaven is a very big place, and to help them get around, gives each of them a set of roller skates. A little later a very elderly Polar bear arrives. He is very thin and obviously has had a touigh time over recent years. His bones protude and he obviously has trouble getting comfortable, so St Peter gives him a huge, plump, golden pillow to lie on. A few days later St Peter goes to see how he is getting on and the bear tells him he is delighted with his golden pillowm. So St Peter asks him if there is anything else he needs.
"Well, I don't want to seem greedy," says the bear, "But some more of those meals on wheels would go down a treat!"
Bumblie3
Last edited by bumblie3; 08-27-2014 at 10:06.
Similar tale, Rich, 3 penguins go to heaven. St Peter says that heaven is a very big place, and to help them get around, gives each of them a set of roller skates. A little later a very elderly Polar bear arrives. He is very thin and obviously has had a touigh time over recent years. His bones protude and he obviously has trouble getting comfortable, so St Peter gives him a huge, plump, golden pillow to lie on. A few days later St Peter goes to see how he is getting on and the bear tells him he is delighted with his golden pillowm. So St Peter asks him if there is anything else he needs.
"Well, I don't want to seem greedy," says the bear, "But some more of those meals on wheels would go down a treat!"
Bumblie3
While wandering around Naval Air Museum at Pensacola, I came across this little fella. He looks distinctly like one of the intrepid team that flew around the world in the Caproni, and I can only surmise that drink got the better of him in one of the celebratory revels.
On the other hand, all the little buggers look alike......
Run for your life - there are stupid people everywhere!
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